After musing about the movie Still Alice, I will now explain the poem part.. first the poem:
Do not ask me to remember,
or try to make me understand,
Let me rest and know you're with me,
Kiss my cheek and hold my hand,
I'm confused beyond your concept,
I am sad and sick and lost,
All I know is that I need you to be with me at all cost,
Do not lose your patience with me,
Do not scold or shun my cry,
I can't help the way I'm living,
Can't be different though I try,
Just remember that I need you,
That the best of me is gone,
Please don't fail to stand beside me,
Love me till my life is done.
I had most recently seen the poem posted on Richard Branson's blog. Thankfully he credited the author! I found an online article from the 14 June, 1996, Orlando, Florida Sentinel Newspaper written by Bo Poertner about Owen Darnell;
"A few months before Esther Darnell died of Alzheimer's disease, she sat in a nursing home and studied her husband's face as if it held some great mystery.
Owen Darnell, 74, of Daytona Beach was all too familiar with his wife's puzzled look. It was the same one he saw when she struggled to read the clock or to understand the TV news.
Esther had been a beautiful, loving and intelligent companion. She had studied at Columbia University and had earned graduate degrees in pharmacology and natural sciences at the University of Havana in Cuba. She had taught high school math.
But the disease gradually tangled her thinking and erased her memory.
....
Owen Darnell wrote about his experience in caring for his wife in a 26-page booklet titled A Room Without Doors. I don't know if he's still alive today, but I'm sure he'd be happy to see this:
A Caregiver's Response by Albert Reinsch, Sr.
(This poem is a humble response to the inspirational and informative poem, An Alzheimer’s Request, by Owen Darnell.)
I shall do my best beloved,
To do all you've asked of me.
When I fail you must forgive me,
For where you are I cannot see.
What I know is that I love you,
More than the world can ever know.
Yet, so often I fail to show it,
I'm so ashamed that this be so.
Please forgive me for my failings,
It is not for lack of trying.
I know you need me to be strong,
But it's so hard when I am crying.
I, too, need you so much my darling,
Until we're renewed in heaven above.
Your smiles reward and give me courage,
Our hugs and kisses seal our love.
